Tag: health

Posted in Uncategorized

What I Wish I Knew at 20: 40 Truths I’ve Learned by 40

Posted on by sherwinelaine

Yesterday, I officially turned 40.

If you had asked my 20-year-old self where I’d be at this age, I probably would have described a life that looks nothing like the one I have now. Back then, 40 felt like “the end”: the end of youth, the end of fun, the end of dreaming.

But waking up today, I realize 40 isn’t the end; it’s the Second Act. It’s the age where you finally stop living for the “performance” and start living for the “person.” In honor of this milestone, I’ve compiled 40 truths I’ve picked up along the way. Whether you’re 20, 40, or 60, I hope these reminders help you protect your peace and find your joy.

On Self-Love & Boundaries

  1. “No” is a complete sentence. You don’t owe an explanation for protecting your time.
  2. You are not responsible for other people’s emotions. Their reaction to your boundary is their work, not yours.
  3. Comparison is a thief. You’re comparing your “behind-the-scenes” to everyone else’s “highlight reel.”
  4. People-pleasing is a form of manipulation. It’s trying to control what others think of you. Just be real.
  5. Trust your gut. Your “vibes” are actually your subconscious picking up on red flags your brain wants to ignore.
  6. Done is better than perfect. Perfectionism is just procrastination in a fancy suit.
  7. Forgive your younger self. She didn’t have the tools you have now.
  8. Your worth is not tied to your productivity. You deserve rest even on the days you “did nothing.”
  9. Don’t dim your light to make others comfortable. If they find you “too much,” let them find less.
  10. The most important relationship you have is with yourself. Everyone else is a guest.

On Health & Aging

  1. Sunscreen is your best friend. Wear it every day. Your 40-year-old face will thank you.
  2. Health is a wealth you don’t notice until it’s gone. Move your body because you love it, not because you hate what you ate.
  3. Sleep is a superpower. Guard your eight hours like your life depends on it.
  4. Mental health is physical health. A stressed mind will eventually break a healthy body.
  5. Drinking more water fixes 50% of your problems.
  6. Aging is a privilege. Many people didn’t get the chance to see their 40th birthday.
  7. Skincare > Makeup. Invest in the canvas, not just the paint.
  8. Listen to your body. That “random” back pain is your body telling you to slow down.
  9. Sugar is the real enemy, not fat.
  10. Go to therapy. Even if you think you’re fine. It’s like a gym for your soul.

On Relationships & Connection

  1. Keep your circle small. You don’t need 100 acquaintances; you need three people who will show up at 3 AM.
  2. Love is a choice, not just a feeling. Choose people who choose you back.
  3. Family isn’t always blood. Build your “chosen family” with people who see the real you.
  4. Stop trying to fix people. They will only change when they are ready, not when you are ready for them.
  5. Loneliness is better than a bad relationship.
  6. Tell people you love them. Frequently. Life is short and fragile.
  7. Apologize when you’re wrong. It doesn’t make you weak; it makes you a leader.
  8. Let go of “toxic” friends. Life is too short for people who drain your battery.
  9. Listen more than you speak. You’ll be amazed at what people reveal when you’re quiet.
  10. Kindness is free, but its value is priceless.

On Career & Growth

  1. It is never too late to pivot. I’m 40 and still growing. You can start that blog, that business, or that degree today.
  2. A job is what you do, not who you are. Don’t give your soul to a company that would replace you in a week.
  3. Failure is just data. It’s telling you what didn’t work so you can find what does.
  4. Financial freedom is better than “stuff.” Save for your future self.
  5. The “Right Time” is a myth. If you wait for the stars to align, you’ll be waiting forever.
  6. Invest in your brain. Read books, take courses, stay curious.
  7. Hobbies are essential. Do things just because they are fun, not because you can monetize them.
  8. Travel as much as you can. Seeing the world shifts your perspective in ways a book never can.
  9. Comparison kills creativity. Stay in your own lane.
  10. The best is yet to come. Believe it.

Entering my 40s feels like finally exhaling a breath I’ve been holding for two decades. If you’re reading this and you’re feeling “behind,” just know that your timeline is yours and yours alone.

Which of these lessons resonated with you the most? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments below!